A little introduction….

I am sure you can count on more than one hand, how many times someone has told you “But you are too young for Breast Cancer”? Some days I feel like shouting back like a hormonal teenage girl “Well, I DID get Breast Cancer”….. but instead I take a deep breathe inme introduction and out and politely respond.

The truth is although uncommon, younger people (yes both female and male) do get breast cancer. People like me, people like you.

After being diagnosed at 38 with Breast Cancer, I turned to my good old loyal friend “G$$gle” in search of someone young like me who really understood how I felt.  In this day and age, I assumed there would be hundreds of support networks out there but after searching pages and pages my so called bestie g$$gle had let me down.  I honestly felt deceived by my bestie but more so, I felt lonely.  Lonely seems like an ironic word – I have a brilliant husband, a 4 year old son and a 12 year old step daughter, a really close set of family and friends – yet I felt alone.  I didn’t like how I felt, I knew there must be hundreds ,thousands of people who were also going through this and felt exactly the same way and I didn’t want another person to have to feel like this.

I wanted to create a support group for people like us to talk about this serious subject but as the same time I wanted us to tackle this in a light-hearted way and instead of g$$gle, let’s “doodle”… J



1CA33473-9FE8-4FFD-8348-E9844D98B476.jpegSince this “bad boob” journey began almost 2 years, I’ve met so many other ladies with their own “Shitty Titty” stories.

Sadly a few days ago, the world lost one of it’s “bad boob warriors”.

Felicity aka Flickitty was one bloody amazing lady.  I thought I had a shoe obsession until I stumbled across a cancer research article showing an absolutely gorgeous lady who had stuck 2 fingers up to the Big C and had worn a different pair of funky shoes (yep and I do mean funky / wacky) to her Radiotherapy – yep over 20 different pairs of shoes.

I just had to make contact with this lady, she was my kind of girl and turned out she was a yorkshire lass and her family was as obsessed about Minis as we were!!

….and there our virtual friendship began

We exchanged photos of our pre chemo hair, chatted about our boys (she had 2 little ones) and our passion for raising boob cancer awareness.

A few months later we got to finally meet and I got to “pamper” her family and friends at a breast cancer fundraiser.  She was as beautiful in real life as she was in her shoe photos – inside and out!

Unfortunately in March, the Big C had returned.  A few weeks later this Bad Boob Warrior had become a Bad Boob Angel.

Felicity touched so many peoples lives and although I had only known her a short while, she really touched mine.

My heartfelt thoughts go out to her beautiful family and in her honour I’ll continue the fundraising in the funkiest pair of bloody heels I can find!!!



Sent from Mail for Windows 10


1 year since the bell

Yes I am still alive!!!!! – sorry – I know I have been crap at keeping in touch…… If I were your mate then you would probably have told where to shove our friendship…… Is playing the C card still allowed?????

Well today is actually a big milestone – this time last year I was ringing that bloody Chemo bell!!  The past year really has flown by!!!!!returnringthebell

For those who follow the blog, back in September I ran Great North Run!!! OMG it was an amazing achievement and you probably remember I had loads of bloody injuries leading up to it, it was touch and go right up to the race but nothing was gonna stop me!!  The best feeling in the world was seeing my family 200m from the finish – I even had time to give the little man a hug and finished in less than 3 hours – woohoo – 2 fingers to you Lenny!!!

A lot has been changing in my own life too.  The company I worked for got acquired a few weeks ago and we were told to prepare for the worst.  It has been an emotional rollercoaster waiting to find out what was happening with our jobs, but to be honest when you have been through the shit that it is the Big C, it puts everything else into perspective.  I lot of my colleagues have been really stressed where as I have been little miss chilled – well mostly, no wobblemeter reading required although I did decide to get absolutely hammered when I finally got told that I would be leaving end of Feb – omg I did pay for all those double grand mariner’s I DEMANDED hubby to get me!!!!! – never been so ill in over 10 years!!!

So it was time to get the dust off my cv. It hadn’t been updated for years and actually the thought of interviewing did scare me.  I used to be so bloody good at interviewing but as I say to a lot of people,  I’m a different person now and the Big C did knock my confidence, the same way baby brain did!!!

But I gave myself a pep talk before the interview and smothered myself in confidence oils – the magic potions must have worked as I got a job offer a couple of weeks ago!!!

I will really miss my colleagues, I’ve been with the same company over 9 years and I’ve been through so much with them divorce, marriage, child birth, the big C.  Deep down though I am ready for a change, I need a new challenge  and although I feel like a family is being split up, the family will still keep in touch!

A couple of week’s ago I had my review with the Prof.  Good news – Bloods normal!!!! Normal never felt so good!!! I even got a hug from Mr Pink Pants.  He still is my superhero, I think he always will be.  Unfortunately, he’s having to be the superhero to some of my friends too…. Not so good

Yep the Big C gets everywhere. The bas$tard Big C has invaded one of my closest friends. A boob invader big C like me.  It’s weird, when it happens to one of your friends it’s a strange emotion.  I now have an appreciation of what my friends went through with me.  I felt so angry at first, then an overwhelming wanting to help and support her.  I guess I feel that having been through this, I can help her in ways even those really close to her can’t.  If she is reading this blog, I want her to know that me helping her, is helping me too, don’t ever worry about asking too many questions.  It also makes me thankful for all the help I got and still get from my amazing boob friends.

I must admit, I am super-excited about December and the build up to Christmas.  Last year having fu$k all immunity meant I had to miss out on Christmas fairs, pantos, plays.  Well guess what, this year I am going to every bloody event going in the calendar, whether I am invited or not!!!!

Oh Jingle bells, jingle bells….

The Return of the Boob Toastie

So 2 weeks ago, it was time to face the music and have my first mammogram since Lenny was evicted.  I must admit, it was not an experience I was looking forward to……

The bad boob is still so bloody sore even without being sandwich pressed into the “boob toastie” machine and of course you can’t help but think “what if it’s come back”???

The actual mammogram itself was fine, at least this time they didn’t pump dye and turned my arm into Popeye the Sailor man unlike my first mammogram!

It was a few days later when the after effects of the “squash” started to kick in – I tell you it was more bloody painful than the boob surgery!!

It’s not been easy 9 days of “waiting”…. I’ve been quite a stroppy cow at times and my usual “motivated” self had completely lost her mojo.  It didn’t help that 2 weeks ago I had to call hubby to come and pick me up half way through my 11 mile training run.  I am sure someone is really trying to “test” me at the moment…… First the suspected stress fracture now my bloody knee is hurting.

I haven’t got time for injuries, I’ve got great north run in less than 3 weeks!! Sod off injuries.

I’ve felt like my life has been on “hold” until the results.  I wasn’t expecting bad news but I just needed see it in writing!

So last Wednesday was results day.  Hubby and I had agreed – if it was good news, we were going out for dinner, if it was bad news I was getting pi$$ed!!

I’d just literally sat down in my consultant’s office when I heard “your mammogram is clear”!!!! Wooohhoooo I felt like a free woman!, I refrained from giving him a big hug and kiss and instead had a boob inspection, I don’t think I have ever been “inspected” so much but best to be extra safe than sorry.

The consultant was so pleased with the  new boobs that he asked if he could take pics for a training seminar on the reconstruction technique that I had, not quite a page 3 model but I’ve asked for half the royalties!

My day got better …… I went to get my knee checked and I have weird band syndrome, I know I know but chemo brain kicks in at all the wrong times!!!  Apparently common for runners but it isn’t a show stopper! It does mean no running at the moment but she did say I could try a very SLOW jog…… OMG what a day!!!!

Gemsy is back, complete with Mojo !!