AM

It’s 7:30am and I am waiting at the hospital for my final pre-op blood test before Eviction-day! Today, we should be been travelling to Amsterdam, our first child free trip abroad.  Instead, Lenny the gatecrasher is having his leaving party in York.

York isn’t quite Amsterdam but I am not going to let Lenny get in the way of fun. York is my favourite city and I will be spending it with Hubby and my very special friend Rosie, who will join us for the leaving party tonight.

Rosie and I have known each other for 20 years, she claims to be 27 which would make her 7 when we first met at Uni! She is a “Yorkshire lass” like me, although she is the poshest speaking yorkshire bird I have ever met!  We have had many “adventures” over the years, my all time favourite is her calling a local curry place after closing asking “do you have any fish fingers?” They actually offered to cook them for her if she brought them over. “Bring your own food for us to cook” was clearly not a great business move as they closed down a few years later.

Now and again I wonder what my close friends are going through during my journey and how they are coping. I try to imagine how I would feel in their shoes, what would I say to them? It might sound strange but I often find I worry more about my family and friends than I do about myself during this roller-coaster.

Then a little voice in my head reminds me of what another breast cancer survivor friend told me “It is time to put yourself first for a change, focus on you”!!!

Rob and I spend the rest of the day chilling in the Hotel Spa.  We love Spas, it’s our treat to each other every 6 months or so.  Usually we both have a couple of treatments but as I have recently found out….. when you mention the big “C”, they won’t touch you with a barge pole 😦

So far during this journey, I have not got “angry” but being labelled with a “You have cancer” tag feels like I have been stripped of my own self identity.  Why do we have to “label” everyone? Before I had cancer I was “Gem”, why should a 2.5cm boob “invader” change who I am?

This invader clearly picked the wrong person to mess with!!

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PM

After checking out the extensive gin and cocktail menu earlier in the day, we decide to have a couple of pre-dinner drinks in the hotel bar.

At dinner, It doesn’t take much encouragement from Hubby, for me to agree to order bubbles.  The young lady returns with the bottle of bubbly and innocently asks “celebrating anything special”??

I look at Rosie, I am dying to giggle…… “Shall we tell her?” I gesture…….

“Oh go on” Rosie replies

“Well actually, I am having Lenny the breast cancer lump removed on monday” I say in my most serious voice.

“Oh….. sorry” the poor girl replies…. she clearly doesn’t know where to look………..  But tonight, I am not going to worry about others…… “Cheers, Lenny – as my dad says, on yer bike!!!”

Oh dear, this is going to get messy!!!