As I drive back with little man after dropping Rosie at the station, I can feel my mood start to change.
I have just had an amazing 24 hours and all of a sudden I start to feel lonely.
I don’t think the tiredness kicking in is helping and I know that it will be hours before hubby is home. He’s stuck in traffic after picking up his daughter. It will be after 9 when he gets back.
I know it sounds bad but I just can’t bear to put little man to bed. I need Mummy cuddles more than anything right now. I noticed a blue vein appear today between my breasts and I can’t help but think it is something bad. I really hope it isn’t the sign of something worse. Lenny had a vein, greedy sod!
Little man seems to be enjoying watching Netflix for hours, he should be in bed i know but I don’t want to be alone.
The thoughts are getting darker and I am counting down the minutes for him to get back.
I am trying so hard to hold it together. I know I will be ok once he is back and puts me in my place.
Hubby is back!!!
I ask if we can get the kids to bed asap and tell him discreetly I NEED them in bed!
When he has sorted them out I explain my concerns.
“It’s probably just the reaction to the radiotherapy, “Let’s talk to the prof about it Monday”
He is right, I need to talk to the prof not google!